Friday, January 3, 2003

ungreatful wretches

school doesn't start for another two weeks, and aleady i'm soo tired of being home. it's not so much my parents, in fact they've been great. it's more of my loving siblings. i don't remember being so aloof when i was a teen. it saddens me to see them live a life of spending money and throwing around expensive items as if they were easy to come by. here, our parents work 80 work weeks just to pay the bills for these items. each of the siblings runs around with a credit card they've never had to pay off. maybe its because i've worked some and i have a concept of the value of a dollar and how the goverment takes 30% of every one you earn. 30%!! If I lost 30% of every point I earned in a class, I would be barely above passing!!

none the less, one sibling gets paid to continue his education, and yet mom still foots the bill for his condo. the other sibling decides she needs a new pair of boots with round toes, because her rich friends have them... so she uses mom's credit card to by a pair. this same sibling is also having her $6K/semester living expenses paid for by the parental units. that's 3-4 times more than i need in one semester. she also has no qualms about spending mom and dad's hard earned cash to color her hair so she can be blonde...(keep in mind here, we're asian) or eating out across the street every day.. or not even using the laptop dad shelled out over $2.6K to buy. i wonder how they'll turn out financially.

on the same token, apparently, to them i'm stupid. her laptop doesnt work and so i try to fix it.. it needs serious help but she decides that its fine... fine so be it. dad shelled out money for the laptop and 3 years of service that she won't even use because its broken. she won't even bother to get it fixed. because, she thinks, i don't know what i'm talking about... given my work history and her knowlege of computers that ecompasses little more than "point and click" i have to laugh it off. this is also the person who pouts and cries when dad doens't let her go out with her friends on new years eve, considering the last time she went out, the car was shot at.

i'm more than happy with my bulky computer, the fact that i'm schooling in the portopottie of texas, hundreds of miles away from my friends, wearing clothes i bought years ago or at a vintage resale store... because there is no other way to be happy, than to be comfortable. and i'm comfortable not spending money i didn't earn. i'm comfortable with how i look and with what i have. and that's a good kind of happiness to have. everyone dies the way they live.

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