Saturday, November 16, 2002

So, is there an Almighty?

How blasphemous to even ask, huh? Well, its been a few days, so here's the fo-wun-wun.

For a week I had been mulling over whether or not I aced the thermo exam. I felt soo good when I got out of the test I was wondering if my day was going too good, remember that? I sure do. I rationalized my good feelings with poor DJ Jammies having her leg pee'd on by a dog in the park. After all, that balances all in the hieuy-world.

Finally, we got our exams back on Thursday. I figured, eeh, I missed 2 or three points.. 5 max.. I could maybe accept 10.. but no more than that. Low and behold the ArchAngels above fell to the ground in thunderous roaring laughter as I peered at the 82 on my exam. How was this possible? This was the one test I actually worked out *without* the book and I truely understood everything in the two chapters we had covered! This was impossible. I felt poo well up in my gut when I saw that the 82 was with 6 points added to my first grade. I could hear the Angels pee'in in thier loinclothes when I saw those 6 points. How cruel is that? So as it turns out now, even if I score a perfect 100 on the final, I still have a fat ugly B. One other guy made a 105. The one kid who copies and hardly shows up to class made a 96. That tells me something. No matter how much effort I put in, how many hours of sleep I miss, I will always be shat on by the Almighty. Tell me different. I beg you. So, I lose my faith everyonce in a while. Sometimes I get it back when I feel forgiving. But, having read the Bible.. as a story book mind you.. I find that it portrays the Almighty as a meanie.. I don't like to think so, but in fact it's been proven to be true on many occasions - many prayers have ended up as a slap-in-my-face. I've never had to give up on Karma or other teachings. They follow the nature of the universe and have yet to fail me. If that means that that Almighty will forsake me, then so be it, I have yet to being truely saked when I've asked sincerely for help.

That aside. I slept finally. Caught up on almost all the sleep I missed this semester since losing it wasn't worth the hassle. I went to a movie last night and ate out. Had souper salads and dairy queen and the movie was 8 mile. Not a bad flick. I enjoyed watching something that reminded me that the rest of the world isn't hickafied like Lubbock. Dad sent me an email and told me to keep trying at my grades. I'm going to because atleast my Dad has faith in me, as I do in him. I like faith that goes both ways not just in one direction. And so there you have it.

I did some homework today, slept a whole heck of a lot. And am going to talk to my Huny online now. You all take care.

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